Wow I needed this. I was up late last night crying because I too feel like the world has left us with even less time than I thought it would. Especially with long covid limiting how much capacity I have to create art and distribute it without further risks to my health.
I saw In A Lonely Place many years ago and liked it a lot. I think I’ll watch it again.
But I also wanted to thank you because every time I see another queer person acknowledge the similarities between the ongoing pandemics (sisters not twins is apt) I feel less alone and more hopeful for change. I am functionally excluded from queer communities I used to inhabit because I can’t afford to get covid again (I have long covid after giving up so much to try to avoid getting covid in the first place). The ways I can still participate, online or in fleeting masked interactions are so meager in comparison to what I used to have and painful when I watch people deliriously cosplay that the year is 2018.
Meanwhile there are people (generally younger than me) telling me, someone who’s first few years out and active were still in the days when HIV was a death sentence, and who knew people who suffered, “how dare” I make any comparison. Because I’m not a cis gay man and clearly that just makes me a “hysterical hypochondriac” who wants to co-opt a tragedy. One which again, I remember and they do not.
Whew. That’s a lot. If you read this far thanks for that too.
It's all a lot to experience, process, and contextualize. I hope you're able to find other queers who can make community accessible to you. You deserve it, as do we all.
this may be too forward a comment, but I had been talking about your work with friends the other day and thinking about what I know of your writing / having a job praxis, and really admiring that. There was some part of me that felt the desire to reach out (as I sometimes do with writers to let them know their work means very much to me) simply to say that your writing has meant very much, and it is something I would aspire to do, to produce such quality while having a job (have been under/unemployed for too much time).
In any case, this piece really resonated with me, and also offered some comfort that someone with your talent rides the same currents that ache with the notion of making books in the world, having people read them, and trying to maintain what makes writing good. It's been something that has felt like a wounded struggle for me over the past four years (trying to "make good" or "get recognition" has truly been a blow to the writing I just want to do, to make me live in the world, and boy is it fucking awful). In any case, this has been somewhat maudlin, and I apologize, but however many books you get out there, or newsletters, they have been so appreciated by me, and I look forward to Casanova. Please come on book tour to Chicago! We'd be lucky to have you.
This is so kind. Thank you ♥️ Not maudlin at all. Our energies, resources, and attention spans are splintered by survival and solidarity, so these are things we're all forced to contend with. I wish you the best of luck in your own work. And I plan on coming to Chicago!
Wow I needed this. I was up late last night crying because I too feel like the world has left us with even less time than I thought it would. Especially with long covid limiting how much capacity I have to create art and distribute it without further risks to my health.
I saw In A Lonely Place many years ago and liked it a lot. I think I’ll watch it again.
But I also wanted to thank you because every time I see another queer person acknowledge the similarities between the ongoing pandemics (sisters not twins is apt) I feel less alone and more hopeful for change. I am functionally excluded from queer communities I used to inhabit because I can’t afford to get covid again (I have long covid after giving up so much to try to avoid getting covid in the first place). The ways I can still participate, online or in fleeting masked interactions are so meager in comparison to what I used to have and painful when I watch people deliriously cosplay that the year is 2018.
Meanwhile there are people (generally younger than me) telling me, someone who’s first few years out and active were still in the days when HIV was a death sentence, and who knew people who suffered, “how dare” I make any comparison. Because I’m not a cis gay man and clearly that just makes me a “hysterical hypochondriac” who wants to co-opt a tragedy. One which again, I remember and they do not.
Whew. That’s a lot. If you read this far thanks for that too.
It's all a lot to experience, process, and contextualize. I hope you're able to find other queers who can make community accessible to you. You deserve it, as do we all.
this may be too forward a comment, but I had been talking about your work with friends the other day and thinking about what I know of your writing / having a job praxis, and really admiring that. There was some part of me that felt the desire to reach out (as I sometimes do with writers to let them know their work means very much to me) simply to say that your writing has meant very much, and it is something I would aspire to do, to produce such quality while having a job (have been under/unemployed for too much time).
In any case, this piece really resonated with me, and also offered some comfort that someone with your talent rides the same currents that ache with the notion of making books in the world, having people read them, and trying to maintain what makes writing good. It's been something that has felt like a wounded struggle for me over the past four years (trying to "make good" or "get recognition" has truly been a blow to the writing I just want to do, to make me live in the world, and boy is it fucking awful). In any case, this has been somewhat maudlin, and I apologize, but however many books you get out there, or newsletters, they have been so appreciated by me, and I look forward to Casanova. Please come on book tour to Chicago! We'd be lucky to have you.
This is so kind. Thank you ♥️ Not maudlin at all. Our energies, resources, and attention spans are splintered by survival and solidarity, so these are things we're all forced to contend with. I wish you the best of luck in your own work. And I plan on coming to Chicago!